Have you ever had to deal with grumpy children who refused to attend school? Having a child who refuses to go to school is a major problem. While some school anxiety is natural, consider the parents whose back-to-school troubles have taken on a whole new meaning. Their child’s resistance to school has developed into a more serious psychological issue known as school refusal.
Most children refuse to go to school frequently after an absence, such as illness, vacations, or a significant shift. The transition can be joining a new school or transferring from elementary to secondary school. In such cases, parents prefer tutoring their children through online tuition in the UK. It teaches kids at home without any school refusal problems.
School refusal is due to a complex combination of various risk factors affecting the kid. These factors include ( fear of failing), their family (such as overprotective parenting or illness), the school (such as bullying), and social barriers (such as peer pressure).
Here are some steps you will have to follow to face a child who refuses to go to school:
Identify Any Underlying Physical Issues That May Be Preventing Your Child From Going To School
Ask yourself these questions if your child refuses to go to school. Try hard to get the answer
- Is there any problem with my child?
- Is my child eating well?
- What was my child’s sleep pattern?
- Has your child made any recent adjustments to their routine?
- Are we looking forward to a significant occasion ahead?
- Is my child going through an excessive amount of activity?
- Is my child refusing to attend school because of anxiety?
Identify Any School-Related Issues That May Be Causing Your Kid Distress, Anxiety, Or Fear
A child refuses to go to school when they face trouble with teachers or other fellows. Your child may be terrified of receiving poor grades or failing a course. Another possibility is that maybe your child is mentally tortured or bullied. As a result, your 10-year-old does not want to go to school or may develop a dislike for school.
Make a call to the school principal and inquire about your child’s school performance to find out the specific cause. Give your child some time to understand the process and not panic.
Make A Discussion With Your Child
What to say to a child who does not want to go to school?
Talk about what’s bothering your child while also reassuring them that you would put a strategy in place to get them back to school. However, keep in mind that some children cannot express their concerns. If the conversation does not have a positive impact, do not force it. Make sure that you trust your children that they can overcome this obstacle and that you will be there to support them.
Avoid Lengthy Lectures
Avoid lengthy debates and conversations about the value of attending school. Lecturing will not help, and it might even make things worse. Any attention, significantly negative attention, can amplify and prolong a problem. Lengthy lectures can lead to further resistance from going to school.
Take The Role Of A Detective
Look for patterns in your child’s illness complaints. Does he have a stomachache or a headache when he wakes up?. When he’s busy and distracted, does he complain about these things?. Is he sick on Saturdays?. Play detective while remaining objective. Avoid putting your child on the defensive by doing it in a poor, non-accusatory manner. Look for indicators as to why your child refuses to go to school.
Make Staying At Home Less Tempting
Tell your child that if he is sick, he should go to the doctor, stay in bed and relax, turn off the television, and so on. Make sure that no one can watch television or play video games. If kids stay at home, they should not have complete control over the house. If you stay at home with your child, do not lavish extra attention or pity on them. You do not have to make staying at home seem tempting.
Create A Setting That Is Similar To That Of A Classroom
If your child is not sick and needs to stay home, make him read, study, sit straight at a desk, and so on. You might also choose to prohibit sleeping for teens, as this is appealing to many. Working parents may find some of these tips challenging to implement but do your best. Consider enlisting the help of a friend, relative, or neighbor who is not working for a short period.
Make A Sick Policy In Advance
For example, you may make it a rule that your child attends school unless they have a fever. If your child is seriously not well, the school nurse can assess the situation. If necessary, send them home. Similarly, do not spend much time addressing physical problems, especially if the doctor has already decided that nothing is wrong medically.
Encourage Taking Support
Consider having someone else drive your child to school until the matter resolves. Emotions are so high during this time. It may be beneficial to relieve yourself of the responsibility of forcing your child to attend school. Let the father drive the child to school if the mother is experiencing separation anxiety. Alternatively, assign these responsibilities to a friend or family member until the child has successfully returned to school.
What To Tell A Child Who Refuses To Go To School?
The majority of parents lack exact words to mention to their children when they refuse to go to school. They randomly yell at them or scold them. Instead of understanding what your child is going through, your quick reaction can worsen the situation.
Explain to your child that you understand their situation. ‘I see you’re nervous about going to school,’ you could say, for example. I know it is not easy, but it is in your best interests to go. Your teacher and I will be of help to you.’
Make certain your children know that you expect them to attend school using clear, calm comments. Instead of saying ‘if,’ say ‘when.’ Instead of saying, ‘If you make it to school tomorrow…,’ you might add, ‘When you’re at school tomorrow…’
By expressing positive and encouraging things, you can demonstrate that you feel your child can go to school. ‘By going to school, you demonstrate your bravery,’ for example. Doing these will increase your child’s self-belief.
Use straightforward remarks that restrict the option for your child to answer ‘No!’.
This blog mentioned multiple tips to respond to your 10 year old who refuses to attend school. We are sure after going through this blog, you are confident enough to deal with your child who does not want to go to school.